Turf Zone – MusselShell
Portobello promenade might not be the easiest place to turf on a busy Sunday afternoon in July but it’s well worth it for the atmosphere. Here, the pace is slow, chilled and simply delightful. People are sauntering along the walkway, cafés and eateries are thriving, people are swimming in the North Sea and not all of them are wearing bathing costumes. Tut tut! Children and dogs are running back and forth getting in everyone’s way but somehow it doesn’t matter, I slow down to walking speed, or rather just about making forward progress without falling over speed. Time to chill out, at least for a little while.
My target for the trip was two turfer uniques. The first at zone PortyBeach, going by the turf name of deej. The second at zone Joppazone, and Biddies is the turf name. Two more added to the list bring the total to something or the other. Hold on. I’ll need to look. There, 353 turfer uniques. Could have had more if I’d ventured across Edinburgh but just could not be arsed, to be honest.
Now, thoughts today were on the subject of turf names. It never fails to amaze me just what people come up with and I find it good fun trying to work out just how they do that, or what they actually mean. Most often I’m completely wrong. Some are fairly obvious. Take my own as an example, PlanetGary. No explanation required there. There’s one called KingSlayer, most likely taken from A Game of Thrones though there are other possible sources. It was the derogatory nickname given to character Ser Jaime Lannister for the regicide of the King Aerys Targaryen.
There’s a new one here locally by the name of NuclearPasta. One might imagine this turfer left the pasta in the microwave a little too long. Then there’s tobythedog, which has me wondering how said mutt manages to work the phone? Here a few others for you to wonder about: BigBoomer, ScottyDog, HappyHibby, gob5hite, ZulaTheAlien, TheLovely, TheInquisitor, CardiffSoulCru, SnickerDoodle, greasedweasel and OchilWomble, to name but a few.
Now, I’ve seen a few turfers change their turf name recently which of course they are allowed to do, even if it does add enormous confusion to other turfers. This has me wondering if I should also change my turf name to something entirely different. Just for fun. During the course of my turf session on the bike down to Portobello today I’ve come up with a few potentials.
The first is BigSausage, which is slightly suggestive but better than WeeSausage. Another one was GreenBogie, slightly disgusting. How about TatieBogle, the Scots word for a scarecrow. Another Scots one could be GhillieDhu, a gentle but sometimes wild character from the fairy world. Suggestions on a stamped addressed postcard please. If you are old enough to know what that actually is?
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